13 year olds fans of Matt Haig? When I researched suicide for a post I wrote here a few weeks ago, I found alarming statistics of teenage suicides. “Teen girls are dying by suicide more often than before. Over 60% of ER admissions are females and many were young women between 15–19.”

Shame and beliefs like “I am not enough,” “I’m not worthy”, “I’m not loveable,” are only too common. Some struggle with these feelings for decades.

The problem starts at early years between 5- 9 years of age. Family secrets, shouting matches between our parents (or caregivers), even teachers whose judgement “She’s a difficult child,” or “He’ll never make anything of himself,” can hurt our fragile self esteem and yes, damage our childlike innocence. It’s more than our innocence.

When we were in our mother’s womb, we felt safe and had all our needs met. As soon as we were born, we found that we got attention by being good. If we were still ignored, we may resort to “bad” behaviour to earn us the label of being difficult. Teens with hormones raging, peer pressure, bullying in school, ADHD, mood swings. Is it such a surprise that depression started from those early years? When teenagers were struggling to find a sense of their identity?

The question is whether enough is being done to help teens. Mental health is still a taboo subject. I believe it’s the adults themselves who are not willing to put aside the stigma so that people can get help.